Five years ago, I was married with two kids, a dog, and two cats. I owned my own home, had good retirement set up, and some money in the bank. I thought I was doing well, but a divorce set me back financially. Half of everything was gone. Even with a six figure income, I found myself renting (not owning) and living far beyond my means to try to keep my kids and myself living a lifestyle we were all accustomed to.
When I first separated, I moved out of the house I owned into a townhouse that I rented. Instead of sharing the cost of a mortgage, I was now paying the full rent and all utilities, groceries, etc. on my salary. On a low six figure salary, I was paying $2,300 per month in rent in addition to all the other expenses. I wasn’t sure how I was going to do it, but I felt like I’d figure it out.
In the three years that followed, I ended up moving two more times. And as anyone who has ever moved knows, it’s costly to do. You have to pay movers, security deposits, clean-up costs, utilities set up and close down fees. It’s a couple thousand dollars every time this happens. It ate into any savings that I had. Moving cost me at least $5,000 for the movers and utilities for the total of three moves.
The two cats came with me to the townhouse, and I quickly broke down and agreed to get a dog for my daughter. Little did I know how expensive that decision would turn out to be. It was an older dog that had a couple of tumors, which we removed over time. $1,000 for the first tumor, and $600 for the second tumor. She turned out to be a very anxious dog that initially had a lot of accidents in the home and brought a lot of stress for everyone else. She terrorized the cats. So much so that the male cat got really stressed out and developed a urinary track blockage. This required an emergency $1,000 surgery and a switch to special urinary-tract canned food only diet to the tune of about $100 per month or $1,200 per year. (I put both cats on the diet because they were eating in the same room.) Did I mention cats can live to be 20 years old, and mine are only eight as I write this?
A month or so before the separation, I bought a new car. It was a 2014 Subaru Outback. It was a good car, seemed practical at the time. It was a good family car and nice to have for kids, dog, trips. I didn’t put much of a down payment at the time, but figured I’d be able to pay it down early. So I signed up for a $365 per month loan for SEVEN years. Ouch. If only I had a crystal ball, I would have made a different choice. In addition to the monthly car payment, the car doesn’t get the best gas mileage. I usually get about 20-22 in the city and about 26 when I spend more time on the highway.
I also bought new furniture when I first moved out…costing about $3,500 for living room set and furniture for three bedrooms. The cats destroyed the living room furniture, so I found myself replacing it with a microfiber covering a couple years later. Another $1,500.
There were also a lot of expenses tied to kids and their activities, which I’ll get into later. And there were choices I made to go out to eat with the kids or with friends. I was still in denial on how much disposable income I had.
This paycheck to paycheck living was eating away at me. I found myself in tears month after month as I paid depleted my savings to pay the bills.
I decided to take charge of my finances and live the life I want. In this blog, I will share with you all that I have done and am doing to get my financial life back. Not everything will be successful, but I’m confident that I am moving in the right direction. I have a game plan in mind and the commitment to do whatever it takes.
Thanks for letting me share my journey with you. I hope that you will find it interesting and inspiring.